The Journey

The Tail of the Cowardly Lie-on

So if we are going to talk about my dating experiences, we will have to go back in time a little.

Oh where to begin with Jake the Snake. First let me say that Jake the Snake seemed to be a great package, smart, funny, charming if he wanted, successful, and handsome. Good Catch? I thought maybe… Hmmm, but I thought wrong!

Date one, FUN! Date two, I thought FUN, then he disappeared like Houdini. I was tricked! Ok, not really. It bruised my ego for a day or two, but I didn’t think much of it.

You wouldn’t believe me if I told you that a couple weeks later the girls and I decided to have some fun and go speed dating (15 dates 5 minutes each). We all agreed this will be a good laugh. As I sit waiting for this ridiculous event to happen… and who walks through the door, you guessed it, Jake the Snake! I laughed out loud, and then thought, do I really have to spend 5 minutes with this guy? I did, chemistry was ON the heat was GOOD and then he tricked me again!

I don’t blame Jake the Snake. He is a confusing being, yes. God forbid he opened up a little. A constant wall always kept me at a distance. I became the girl with the flower.. He Loves me He loves me not. Well, it went more like, He Likes me, He Likes Me Not, He’ll Call Me, He’ll Call Me Not! It made me Coo Coo for Cocoa Puffs. I knew better not to get involved, I knew he was Just Not That Into ME, but something felt better than nothing and I guess I hoped he would come around since we always seemed to have fun together. NEGATIVE GHOST RIDER!

Classic girl mistake I told him I cared and BAM he was gone with the wind. After months of dating and speaking in some form everyday he didn’t even think enough of me to tell me he didn’t want to see me anymore, or maybe he met someone else. The world will never know. I guess he owes me nothing and I should get use to this. Not everyone is as honest as I am. So why the Cowardly Lie-on? I handed Jake the Snake an out clause by having two dreaded “talks”. The hardest part about having the “Talk” is starting it, and I did it for him. I gave him his get out of jail free card, and instead he told me everything was fine and that he cared and enjoyed spending time with me. Only I never heard from him again. Thanks for caring Jake the Snake.

What I realized, Jake the Snake didn’t have it in him to let me down. He wasn’t man enough to be honest. Mr. I’m a Good Guy didn’t want to hurt the sweet girls feelings, but he failed to notice that I am a BIG GIRL. He isn’t the end of the world and he certainly isn’t the end of me. So to Jake the Snake you get an F! An F THAT AND A F YOU TOO! No one likes a Cowardly Lie-on!

Lessons learned:

1. Don’t avoid the signs. When a man is into you, you’ll have NO doubts
2. Things that don’t work the first time tend not to work at all.
3. Don’t date on their terms, date on yours.

Thanks for the ride Jakey, it was fun while it lasted!

-A Much Wiser Fisherman

posted by Jen @ 12:33 PM